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I'm super cool, depressed, pilled up. Musically talented.'
36 Things You Obviously Need In Your New Home

beben-eleben:

A Fire Pit IN THE POOL

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A Door That Turns into a Ping-Pong Table

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Chilled Produce Drawers in the Kitchen

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A Wine Cellar Trap Door

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 A Sleepover Room

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A Door Handle That Automatically Turns Off Electricity and Gas When You Leave

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A Swing-Set Dining Table

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A Built-In TV for the Bathtub

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A Glass-Encased Fireplace

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 A Loft Hammock

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A Hot Tub That Flows from the Inside to Outside

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A Huge Round Bedroom Window

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A Stained-Glass Door

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A Library Staircase/Slide

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A Bone-Shaped Pool for Your Dog

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Summary of Romeo and Juliet

romeo:  im so sad
romeo:  ill never be happy
romeo:  a party sure why not ill just sulk around an- WOAH
romeo:  WHO DAT
romeo:  SHE GOT DA BOOTY
romeo:  imma dance with her
romeo:  *dancin wit teh juliet*
juliet:  dafuq are you
romeo:  shh *kiss*
juliet:  :oo  *party over*
romeo:  AYYY LOOK I FOUND DAT LADY'S HOUSE
romeo:  LADY
romeo:  HEY LADY
juliet:  OMG HI I REMEMBER YOU
romeo:  yeah its me hey wanna get married
juliet:  dont you think its too soon
romeo:  idk
juliet:  brb
romeo:  k
juliet:  HEY YEAH LETS GET MARRIED TOMORROW
romeo:  AWW YEAH I BET THIS PUTS ME ABOVE MERCUTIO AND BENVOLIO IN MAN POINTS  *next day*
rome and juli:  FRIAR MARRY US PLEASE:
friar:  idk and ROMEO WEREN'T YOU JUST SULKING OVER ROSALINE LIKE YESTERDAY
romeo:  yeh
friar:  ok fine ur married
rome and juli:  yaaaay  *some time later*
tybalt:  WELL SLAP MY BUTTOCKS AND CALL ME A MONTAGUE IS THAT ROMEO
mercutio:  excuse you dont talk bout my friend like that
tybalt:  shut up mercutio *stab*
mercutio:  WAAHAHAH IM DED *he die*
romeo:  hnnn
tybalt:  ....  romeo HNNN
tybalt:  ...
romeo:  hnnnHIYAAAA *stab*
tybalt:  oH NO IM DED AHH *he die too*
prince:  ohmygod why did i JUST tell you yesterday about fighting
romeo:  i sorry
prince:  no ur banished
romeo:  HWWHWHHAAAT YOU BANBISHED ME
romeo:  *runs to friar* IMMA KILL MYSELF*
friar:  no i have plan just go to mantua ok
romeo:  k *leaves*
juliet:  FRIAR HELP THE LOVE OF MY LIFE THAT I KNEW FOR LIKE 1 DAY JUST GOT BANISHED IMMA KILL MYSELF
friar:  NO JULIET I HAVE A PLAN you drink this potion you look dead you be put in capulet tomb until you wake up and romeo find you and you run away together
juliet:  ok
juliet:  *goes home and drinks potion*
nurse:  hey juliet rise and shi- OOOH MY GOD LADY CAPULET COME HERE OH MY GOD OH MY GOD
lady capulet:  wha- OH NOO OH NO okay lets throw her in the tomb of dead people
nurse:  k
juliet:  *in da tomb* zzZzzZZzzzZ *not actually dead just sleepin*
romeo's servant:  AYY YOO ROMEO I GOTS NEWS FOR YA
romeo's servant:  JULIET'S DEAD
romeo:  WHAT
romeo:  WHAaaAaaaT
romeo:  OKAY YOU KNOW WHAT I'M GONNA GO AHEAD AND POISON MYSELF BEFORE LOOKING INTO THE SITUATION AT ALL OR CONTACTING THE FRIAR OR ANYTHING
romeo:  *buys potion*
romeo:  *breaks into the tomb of dead capulet people*
romeo:  oh my god its juliet wow she doesn't even look dead
romeo:  but im sure she is
romeo:  *kiss juliet*
romeo:  *drinks poison*
romeo:  he ded
juliet:  *yawning* YAWWWN oh i can't wait to see my rome- WHAT DAFUQ
juliet:  IT'S ROMEO NEXT TO ME
juliet:  HE DED
juliet:  *grabs sword and stabs herself*  oh yeah and romeo also killed Paris in the tomb by the way forgot to add that b/c apparently killing tybalt wasn't enough
friar:  *comes in cell*
friar:  uh oh
prince:  WHAT DIS
CAPULET:  WHAT DIS
LADY CAPULET:  WHAT DIS
MONTAGUE:  WHAT DIS
CApULET:  *strokes montagues face* brother
"You never get over it. But you get to where it doesn’t bother you so much."
-Jeffrey Eugenides, The Virgin Suicides (via aukles)

knightofdooom:

if you date me i will buy you things i see in stores that remind of you and make you mac and cheese and brownies and we can watch disney movies and yeah date me

jalexinwonderland:

crywonk:

averytare:

man girls are gorgeous

alright this could mean one of two things

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